[dropcap]C[/dropcap]anadians have a global reputation as peacekeepers and pacifists but, just like the rest of us mortals, their patience isn’t limitless; some things are guaranteed to get them fired up. Here are five situations where you’re unlikely to see them at their best…
A hockey-less winter
Hockey is MASSIVE in Canada and the recently resolved NHL lockout left a big dent in the happiness index of many Canucks – that was 113 days of missed game-time. Add another mild winter here in Southern Ontario, that refuses to support the existence of backyard ice-rinks and you have some very cheesed off Canadians. Best not to mention hockey for the time being…
Mistake them for a US citizen
It’s an old one but a gold one, pretty much guaranteed to elicit a curt response along the lines of, “You do realise that Canadians wear maple leafs from head to toe when travelling outside North America so no one will mistake them for Americans. Americans wear maple leafs from head to toe when travelling outside of North America so no one will mistake them for Americans.” Either that, or, “Yeah, you Europeans all look the same to us too.”
Put them in a car
Polite and courteous Canadians undergo a complete personality change once they get behind the wheel. Driving is about getting from A to B in the shortest amount of time by the shortest possible route, hence the suicidal lane-changing, tail-gating and swerving on the expressway. Driving is no obstacle to eating, drinking, texting or reading the paper and snow just adds to the fun. Cyclists or pedestrians that make so bold as to get in the way of a motorist in some delusional idea of sharing the road, are alerted to their stupidity by loud horn-blasts and too-close-for-comfort passing. They can be recognized by their wing-mirror-shaped bruising.
Make ‘em wait
Canada espouses the American demand for fast service. Unlike Brit’s whose capacity for queuing is legendary, Canadians will get jumpy if forced to stay in one spot for too long. The exception to this is the Tim Hortons drive-thru queue…
Say that again?
Ask a Canadian to say “Out and about” – everyone does…